The Curse of Monkey Island – Insults and replies
Insults and replies
Ordinary pirates — Captain
Rottingham
Insult: Every enemy I’ve met I’ve annihilated!
Reply:
With your breath, I’m sure they all suffocated.
Insult: You’re as repulsive as a monkey in a
negligee.
Reply:
I look THAT much like your fiancée?
Insult: Would you like to be buried or cremated?
Reply:
With you around, I’d prefer to be fumigated.
Insult: Heaven preserve me! You look like something
that’s died!
Reply:The
only way you’ll be preserved is in formaldehyde.
Insult: I’ll skewer you, like a sow at a buffet.
Reply:
When I’m done with YOU, you’ll be a boneless fillet!
Insult: Killing you would be justifiable
homicide.
Reply:Then
killing you must be justifiable fungicide.
Insult: En garde! Touché!
Reply:Oh,
that is so cliché!
Insult: Throughout the Caribbean my great deeds
are celebrated!
Reply:
Too bad they’re all fabricated.
Insult:When your father first saw you, he must
have been mortified.
Reply:
At least mine can be identified.
Insult: You can’t match my witty repartee.
Reply:
I could, if you would use some breath spray.
Insult: I can’t rest until you’ve been
exterminated!
Reply:
Then perhaps you should switch to decaffeinated.
Insult: You’re the ugliest monster ever created.
Reply:If
you don’t count all the ones you’ve dated.
Insult: I’ll leave you devastated, mutilated and
perforated.
Reply:Your
odor alone makes me aggravated, agitated, and infuriated!
Insult:Coming face to face with me must leave
you petrified.
Reply:Is
that your face? I thought it was your backside!
Insult:I’ll hound you night and day!
Reply:
Then be a good dog. Sit! Stay!
Insult: Your stench would make an outhouse cleaner
irritated!
Reply:
Then perhaps you should switch to decaffeinated.
Insult:When I’m done, your body will be rotted
and putrefied!
Reply:
Then killing you must be justifiable fungicide.
Insult:Your lips look as they belong on the catch
of the day!
Reply:When
I’m done with YOU, you’ll be a boneless fillet!
Insult:You’re a disgrace to your species, you’re
so undignified!
Reply:At
least mine can be identified.
Insult: Your looks would make pigs nauseated.
Reply:If
you don’t count all the ones you’ve dated.
Insult: My attacks have left entire islands
depopulated!
Reply:
With your breath, I’m sure they all suffocated.
Insult: You have the sex appeal of a Shar-Pei.
Reply:
I look THAT much like your fiancée?
Insult: My skills with a sword are highly
venerated.
Reply:Too
bad they’re all fabricated.
Insult: You’ll find I’m dogged and relentless
to my prey!
Reply:
Then be a good dog. Sit! Stay!
Insult: I can’t tell which of my traits has you
the most intimidated.
Reply:
Your odor alone makes me aggravated, agitated, and
infuriated!
Insult: I give you a choice. You can be gutted,
or decapitated!
Reply:With
you around, I’d prefer to be fumigated.
Insult:Nothing can stop me from blowing you
away!
Reply:
I could, if you would use some breath spray.
Insult: I have never lost a mêlée!
Reply:You
would have, but you were always running away.
Insult: Never before have I faced someone so
sissified.
Reply:
Is that your face? I thought it was your backside!
Insult:Nothing on this earth can save your sorry
hide!
Reply:The
only way you’ll be preserved is in formaldehyde.
Insult: Your mother wears a toupee!
Reply:
Oh, that is so cliché!
This walkthrough: Copyright © 1998
Joonas Linkola. Not to be reproduced
without permission.
Curse of Monkey Island: ™ & © 1997 LucasArts Entertainment
Company LLC