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Video Game Vacation: Beach Bums

Video Game Vacation: Beach Bums

Video Game Vacation: Beach Bums

Ian Sims and Bailey James present this season’s roundup of the hottest beaches in the pixelated realm


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You love the beach. You’re the first one to slip on your sandals every season and the most reluctant to pack up the volleyball net at the end of the summer. But you’ve seen it all before and you’re itching for something a little different.

Good thing you’ve got this season’s roundup of the hottest beaches in the pixelated realm! We’ve combed universes and planets looking for the best places to catch some sun, and we think you’re gonna love these local spots. Whether you’re looking for activities like shark tuna fishing or just want to relax as the buildings float by, we’ve got something for everyone here. Just send us a postcard, okay?

Final Fantasy XIV – Costa del Sol (“A Symbol of Modern Ul’dah”) 


Costa del Sol is more than just a stunning resort; it is a symbol of modern Ul’dah. Your vacation time is precious, but at Costa del Sol you’ll find it’s very well spent.

Each bungalow has magnificent panoramic views of the tranquil Rhotano Sea and features furniture designed by master craftsman Beatin. For ultimate comfort, our Nanamo Suite has been impeccably designed with an opulent color scheme and sumptuous furnishings.

Whether you’re interested in the land or the sea, you’ll find a wide-ranging portfolio of activities to keep your schedule full. And if you’d rather relax, stretch out on the white La Noscean sands and enjoy a frozen cocktail.

Spend your evenings fishing for an elusive shark tuna and then kick back with your free company at one of our open air bars. Stay up long enough and you’ll experience Costa del Sol’s famous ruby sunrise as dawn lights up the neverending waters of the Rhotano Sea.

Come and experience it for yourself. 

Super Mario Sunshine – Gelato Beach (“Swing On In”)  


The fresh, salty air energizes you. The warm, tranquil waters refresh you. The breathtaking nature renews you. Gelato Beach is one of a kind, a uniquity that stands an echelon above Isle Delfino’s lesser beaches.

Delfino’s freshest catch has landed at Gelato Beach. Chef Torte — Marrymore Cafe, Mushroom Kingdom — is an award-winning chef renowned for his fusion cooking that integrates Gelato’s most famous ingredient — the Delfino watermelon — into traditional recipes from his home country.

Gelato Beach can be your home away from home. Learn to surf, snorkel, or kayak and earn your Delfino suntan. Once the sun sets, take your lover to the largest wooden swing in Isle Delfino and glide beneath the stars.

Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker – Outset Island (“Your Journey Starts Here”) 


Listing: Cozy, Pet-Friendly, Beachfront Bungalow Near Fairy Forest!!
Location: Outset Island, South Great Sea
Host: Grandma

Semi-Private Room
20 Rupees per night

About this listing
Granddaughter was kidnapped and grandson left to fight a bird, renting out bedrooms to make ends meet. Walking distance to dojo, Great Fairy, dungeon. Located on quaint historic island. Includes photoshoot in local Hero’s Clothes and a free hug. Breakfast of Elixir Soup provided. Bed located in loft just off kitchen.

The space
Accommodates: 1
Bathrooms: 0
Bedrooms: 1.5
Beds: 1
Check In: 2PM – 8PM
Check Out: 12PM (noon)
Pet Owner: Pig(s) and cucco(s)
Property type: Bungalow

House Rules
Leave pigs alone
Must listen to one song on loop
No “adventures”

Bioshock Infinite – Battleship Bay (“Be the One to Walk in the Sun”) 


Barely survived falling off a collapsing city monument into a man-made ocean? There’s no better place to convalesce than Columbia’s own Battleship Bay. Real sand abuts relaxing, machine-made waves that cascade over the horizon into a clear, open sky while beachgoers in striped swimwear frolic in the sun.

Stretch out your towel and watch the buildings float lazily past. What’s that sound? Over the low chatter of fellow beachgoers trading garden-variety racial epithets, you can hear the strains of an unfamiliar song played on a pipe organ. Somewhere far in the future, Cyndi Lauper is cursing lost royalties.

A trip to the bay isn’t complete without a stroll along the pier! Arcade games, concessions and concealed ammunition abound, and segregated washrooms are provided for your convenience. Please stay clear of the maintenance areas – the underclass work hard to make sure you have a flawless beachgoing experience and its members don’t like to be disturbed.

As the day draws to a close, be sure to stick around for dancing at dusk  see the girls twirl, feet moving like they’ve never known freedom. Come, join the merriment, and forget about the city crumbling around you   God only knows when you’ll get another moment to relax.

The Curse of Monkey Island – Puerto Pollo Beach (“For Men of Action. Swashbucklers. Rogues. Wanderers!”) 


A warm pastel sunrise. Wide palm leaves casting long shadows on the sand. Gentle waves teasing the shoreline. Puerto Pollo Beach is for lovers (as long as they ignore the smoking rubble of naval battles and decaying defense structures along the coastline). But why would you look anywhere besides in your beloved’s eyes? Puerto Pollo’s shores are a popular proposal spot, and in the event the diamond ring you slide onto your sweetie’s finger contains a voodoo curse that turns her into solid gold, its shimmering sands are a fine place to leave your golden lady-statue waiting while you figure out how to lift the spell.

Located just down the path from a scenic voodoo queen’s hut and within walking distance of a quaint seaside town (stop in for a drink or a haircut!), Porto Pollo is the perfect place to prop up an umbrella and watch the native chickens roost in the underbrush. While your rival swashbucklers battle a snooty cabana boy on the molten sands of Brimstone Beach, you’ll be relaxing in total comfort.

Travel Tip: Guests should keep a close eye on their belongings  pirates are known for pilfering gold on this part of the island.

Ian Sims

Ian Sims

Ian is a video game addict with no hope for recovery. He spends his days trapped inside JRPGs, platformers, and adventure games. His favorite games include the Borderlands series, The Walking Dead, Final Fantasy Tactics, Super Meat Boy, and Amnesia: The Dark Descent. Given his penchant for emotional games and the horror genre, he hopes Oculus is developing a VR system that is resistant to his tears.Ian graduated from The Ohio State University and now works in Wisconsin as an Implementation Consultant at a software company. He is the Editor ‘n Chef of, a millennial food website. Ian owns a Virtual Boy and hopes that someday someone will actually care.

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