Crushworthy Video Game Characters
With Spring in the air the writers at Just Adventure got to thinking about some of our greatest gaming crushes.
With Spring in the air the writers at Just Adventure got to thinking about some of our greatest loves in games – those individuals who we spent countless hours trying to woo with choice-based dialogue and blue feathers in the hope that maybe, just maybe, they might reciprocate our affections.
Allow us to share some of our video game loves and our imagined first dates.
Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life
Though she’s a rolling stone, Nami is the most intelligent of the Harvest Moon boos. Though she can be quiet and standoffish, she’s worth it if you put in the time. Clad in her blue plaid vest and orange t-shirt, Nami has the veritable look of a traveler who wants to experience the world. Whether we’re in Forget-Me-Not Valley or visiting nearby Mineral Town, Nami and I would be happy to appreciate local arts and any archeological dig sites that we come across. And I wouldn’t expect her to settle down in the valley, absolutely not. As traveling companions the world will be our oyster: we can spend summers in Flowerbed Village, visit a reinvigorated Waffle Island with some friends, or maybe share our farming expertise with our fellow farmers in Echo Village.
Ideal First Date: Nami and I would begin the date at Carter’s dig site north of town. Instead of wooing her with my latest artifacts, we’d make a point to find something fun together like a hip fossil or a jade ball. Afterwards we would head across town so Nami could watch me reject Cecelia, because apparently Nami is into that. On the way down to the ocean I’d show her some of the finest offerings of Forget-Me-Not Valley: a turtle wearing a handkerchief, a fish-eating mad scientist, and maybe the local fairies. I wouldn’t worry about the Blue Feather just yet; quality relationships take time.
Knights of the Old Republic (Female Main Character Playthrough)
In a world rife with danger, corruption, and weird space aliens with face tentacles, a girl needs a guide, even if she’s a fallen Sith on a revenge mission. Enter Carth Onasi, the dreamiest male humanoid to be found this side of the galaxy. He’s an expert pilot who’ll swoop his way into your heart faster than the Ebon Hawk traveling at warp speed. Is it the way he wields a Mandalorian Power Shield? His skill with a pair of blaster pistols? Those chocolate brown eyes? No, it’s that brooding self-protection that gets torn down piece-by-piece as you get to know the guy behind the energy shield. Betrayed in the past by a military superior, who decimated Onasi’s home planet, killed his wife and led to his son’s defection to the Dark Side, Carth has vowed never to trust again (can you blame him?) until he meets you and gradually opens up about his past and his hurt. The moment he finally confesses his love to you—in front of your entire traveling party, no less—is electric and satisfying. He’s shed the wounded warrior persona and rediscovered the warm and loyal person he always was inside. It doesn’t get more out-of-this-world than that.
Ideal First Date: After discovering the Star Forge and defeating Darth Malak, Carth and I would want some quality time together without our relationship under the scrutiny of tagalong street urchins and misanthropic droids. I’d have him pilot us to the thickly-forested Wookie planet Kashyyyk, where we’d spend the day exploring the dense network of treehouses and taking in the foliage. We’d settle down in the dark woods for intense discussion (possible topics include the advantages of different weapon classes, the struggles of being a single parent to a developing Jedi, our respective war crimes) until we’d explored all our dialogue tree options. Then he’d lean in for a kiss and the screen would fade to black…
Mass Effect 2, Mass Effect 3
When the Reapers appear on the horizon and the galactic universe is at stake, it’s good to step back and re-evaluate your priorities. The Universe may need a hero, but a hero needs something to fight for. This is where Tali’Zorah makes her appearance. At first, Tali is just a simple Quarian, fighting for her life after being double-crossed by a deceitful mercenary working for the evil Saren. But it isn’t long before Tali makes her home on the Normandy as part of the crew. She’s awkward and fumbles her words, but as I grew to know her, I saw a woman who desired a freedom her people had never had. She had lived as a nomad her entire life, floating amongst the stars as a wanderer. But Tali’Zorah wanted more than that. She wanted a home. A family. And as our fight against the Reapers grew more and more desperate, she realized that what she had been searching for had been right in front of her the whole time. From that moment on, I knew that Tali was the reason I was fighting. I wanted to give her the home and the family that she always wanted.
Ideal First Date: After freeing the galaxy from the threat of the Reapers and brokering peace between the Quarian Fleet and the Geth, I would want to show her how I feel by giving her the one thing she has always wanted. Her home planet Rannoch had been occupied by the Geth for centuries, but now the Quarians were able to return home once and for all. I would want to take her personally down to the planet’s surface in our own private ship and take a peaceful walk on the home she’s always dreamed of. The atmosphere on Rannoch is perfect for her and her kind, which would allow her the freedom of walking around without an environment suit on for the first time in her life. I would take her to one of Rannoch’s many oceans and we could spend a day swimming and appreciating the peaceful planet’s stillness. The house on the hill could come later. We had all the time in the worlds.
Dragon Age Series
Alistair was *really* mad at me after the events at the Landsmeet in Dragon Age: Origins. I manipulated events so that he ended up the sole King, and without having “hardened” him up beforehand, so he wasn’t really ready for it emotionally. In my defense, though, the only way to harden Alistair up was to be sort of mean to him, and honestly, who could do that to such a charming, funny, loyal and handsome guy? Luckily, he’s had a lot of time to get over it – as in an expansion and two sequels – and so I’m sure he’s open to the romance that, as far as I’m concerned, has been written in the stars since he and I first met at the battleground of Ostagar.
Ideal First Date: Alistair’s smashing good looks and devastating sarcastic humor makes him a natural fit for the Hollywood / West Hollywood neighborhood where I live. After an afternoon hike up Runyon Canyon, where we pass sweaty celebrities walking their labradoodles, we freshen up and have some delicious Tex-Mex at Marix on King’s Road. Alistair is turning so many heads, it’s reminiscent of the day a few years ago when Channing Tatum literally stopped traffic as he gave a breakfast interview at Basix, just around the corner on Santa Monica Boulevard. After dinner we take in a special screening of The Exorcist at the Arclight, and afterwards we enjoy the spectacular moonlight views of the city from the open air eighth floor of the parking structure. At midnight I put him in an Uber so he can catch his redeye flight back to Ferelden from LAX. We promise to see each other again soon.
Castlevania: Lords of Shadow Series (Spoiler Alert)
Gabriel is a tragic figure with a tortured soul. I’m a sucker for this kind of downtrodden character, especially if that character also happens to have a great body. Abandoned at birth, Gabriel is taken in by one of the Brotherhood of Light Convents and raised as member of that brotherhood. As an adult, he marries Marie, his childhood sweetheart. But there’s no happily-ever-after here. During the course of the story, Gabriel is betrayed by the Brotherhood; loses everyone he loves, including Marie; and becomes a vampire in order to enter the Netherworld and stop a demon who wants to destroy the world. In the process, he gains the demon’s power, which is considerable. He now seeks vengeance. He discards the name Gabriel, adopts the moniker of Dracula and vows to wreak havoc on the world.
Ideal First Date: Short and sweet: I’ll meet Gabriel anytime, anywhere (except locations in which demons and other nasties are present), and he can have his way with me. If need be, I’ll meet Dracula — even if he’s all decrepit — offer him a drink and let him have his way with me. Then I’d join him in some havoc-wreaking.
Who are YOUR video game crushes? Please let us know in the comments:)
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