Zork: Grand Inquisitor Walkthrough by Mark Curtis

**Indicates not necessary,
but fun to do anyway.

""Indicates quotes from the game, and how
sad it is that I know them without replaying the game.

Outside

After
the propaganda opening, turn around and go toward the Monastery (not the blue
glowing area, nor the well). If this place looks oddly like the Monastery from
Nemesis, that’s because it is. Go over to the large sign totaling up the number
of totemizations and grab the rope. Go back down toward the beginning and then
to the blue glowing area (Port Foozle).

Port Foozle

Go over
to the controls for the speakers (to the left of where you first enter), turn
it up to THAT’S THE SPIRIT. Wait for "Would somebody turn that damn speaker
down …" Right next to the controls, in the icebox, pick up the six-pack
(well, one-pack) containing a can of Mead Light and the plastic things that keep
them together. Go over to the dock and face the crane.

**Put the rope on
the hook and lower it.

Put the plastic thing on the hook and lower it. "Plastic
ACK stuck around neck …" Take the lantern over to the pawnshop (the
place behind you). Have the lantern in your hand and knock on door "Holy
Hungus!" Grab a cigar that he heisted off the Inquisition. "Well I know
a guy, who knows a guy …" Go all the way down to the end of Port Foozle,
where the Inquisitor dolls are. Use the self-lighting cigar on the doll and hide
in the barrel to the left of it, quickly. "Oh, you’re supposed to
smoke it …" Go back into Jack’s place and get the lantern.
Leave Port Foozle, go to Elsewhere, which is the well. Use the rope on the well,
go down the well, and if you’re playing on CD, switch discs.

Crossroads

Once
at the bottom of the well look around for the pipe, or at least the arrow that
lets you look down. Get the token, naturally in a bucket at the bottom of a well.
Face the door and open your spellbook, use REZROV. Go in and down, turn right
and look to your right, and you will see a glass case, with In Case of Adventure
Break Glass, above it. Open the case, take the hammer, close the case, then break
the case with the hammer and take the map and sword.

**Use IGRAM on the
umbrella tree.

Go in the direction opposite the tree and look to the left
of the path on the ground. You should see a totem, like a small rock. Pick it
up and listen to Griff’s talk of the posse or rather phalanx that attacked him.
Keep going forward until at the crossroads, go left until "the rank undergrowth
prevents eastward movement."

Dungeon Master’s Lair

Use
your sword on the vegetation, go forward to the oddly familiar area. Look to the
right, find the shed and look inside, take the magic scroll (THROCK) and the shovel.
Keep going down the path to the DM’s House.

**Use THROCK on snapdragon.

**Talk
to the front door, try spells.

Go around the house to the right side and
find the teleporter (looks like an old phonograph). Use your map and go back to
the crossroads.

Turn left and at the crossing, turn right. You should be
facing the entrance to G.U.E. Tech; the words "In Magic We Trust" should
be on the door. Use REZROV to open the door.

G.U.E. Tech

**Use
THROCK on the grass (but save before doing so).

Upon entering, go to the
first pillar on the left. It seems easiest to start from the bottom and work upward
to match up the pillars, but for a more detailed explanation of the solution:
Spin the bottom one until the picture with some flame and a rock wall appear,
then spin the bottom until some more flames and a forest with a mountain in the
background. Then the top with the picture of the volcano top. For the second pillar,
forward on the right, spin the bottom until the shadow is on the right. The middle
second has its shadow on the right and is four-sided (though only two are visible).
The top section is the one with a Z at the top. Proceed to the final, and most
abstract, pillar. Spin the bottom one until the brick side comes to view. The
middle should be the view out the window and to the sea. The top is the moldy-vegetation
view. Together they create a window to enter G.U.E. Tech. Look around the lovely
area and get ready to … leave. Turn around and exit via the large double doors.
Turn around and you’ll see that it exists in the Ethereal Plains of Atrii, a place
shared by sorcerers, "snack cakes, former child stars, and people who own
ferrets." Go to the right of the fountain to the free dirt and use the shovel
to dig into it and get the spell KENDALL. Head to the teleportation station on
the other side of the fountain and head toward the crossroads.

Once teleported,
turn right and use the subway token in the slot and go to the underground underground.
Head to the map on the wall. "Take the red line east to the yellow line …"
I hope you don’t think you have to do that! Use KENDALL on the map and select
a destination. We’ll first go to Hades.

Hades

Go over to the
skeleton and get the ticket from his left hand. Put the ticket and play, you may
want to save. From the starting position, go up, left, up, up, left, up, left,
left, down, left, left, down, left, down, down, right, down, down, right, right,
up, right, up, up, left, and finally up. "Cha-ching, 500 Zorkmids."
You can go towards the entrance to Hades and face the teleporter to mark it on
the map, thought it’s not necessary. Either way, go to the Monastery.

The
Monastery

The only real reason to be here is just to teleport out, so
do so and teleport back to G.U.E. Tech.

G.U.E. Tech

Go in through
the window of the pillar again.

**Read the notes on the wall to the left
of the entrance.

Once inside, go to the left towards the vending machines.
"Snacks sweet snacks …" Turn your 500ZM Bill into coins using
the change machine. 500 is plenty for the rest of the game, and it is easily accessible
using F9. Turn left to the ice cream machine (the one with three options). Use
a Zorkmid and get a sandwich. "Look, it’s an ice cream bar." The scroll
Obidil can’t be gnustoed because it’s soggy, though it’ll be fixed later. Go to
the candy machine (the one with 12 options). Pay a Zorkmid and get the 11th option,
"… I hate it when that happens." Listen for a distant creak,
then leave the snack area and go to the right to the entrance (but not in) the
Infinite Corridor, look up (if you can’t that’s because you’re in it).
Cast IGRAM on Infinite.

**Cast IGRAM on just corridor.

**Cast IGRAM
on both.

Go in the hallway before it wears off. Go to the end of the hallway
and turn right, to the lockers. The third one in the third row should be open.
Third one, third row, just like where 11 was in the selections … Get the
Prozork tablet and read Better Spell Manufacturing. If the instructions are too
confusing, just use KENDALL. Go to each of the hallways and listen to what happened
to the three magic relics. Go back to the snack area and buy #8, Zork Rocks. Look
down at the bottom of the vending machine and attach the Perma-Suck machine. "Just
where were you keeping that?" Place the Zork Rocks in the soda machine, which
is the only machine you haven’t been to yet. Pay once more and get Blam Classic.
Quickly take the Zork Rocks and go back to the lockers. Wait … wait …
Once the locker is open, take the ID card and proceed to the large door. Use the
card on the scanner to the left of the door. Once in the Spell Lab, take your
sword’s advice of danger and teleport out of there using the teleporter to the
right. Go to the Monastery (or Hades) and ride to Flood Control Dam #3.

Meanwhile
back at the Inquisition …

Flood Control Dam #3

When
backing up from the platform, look to the right at the souvenir device. Place
a Zorkmid in the circle, get the letter opener. Look on the left side for the
pipe and the green stuff at the bottom, which is Moss of Mareilon. Use THROCK
on the moss to make more of it. Then get the increased amount. Go toward the controls
for the dam under the window. Look to the left at the book, get GOLGATEM.

**Use
GOLGATEM over the Frigid River.

Open and close the gates so that three are
open. Use REZROV to open the fourth. Then use the first two or last two buttons
to close all four. "Well, whatever …"

Meanwhile back at
the Inquisition …

Get back to the Spell Lab whether by walking, subway,
teleportation, or any way shape or form.

Spell Lab

Turn and
go forward to face the Six-Armed Invisible Bridge Guy.

**Cast IGRAM.

**Cast
REZROV.

**Just use anything in the inventory, but be wary of using the sword.

Use
your sword on the edge of the screen, the rope of the bridge. Use GOLGATEM.
Look to the left before any of the machines to find the box of BEBURTT scroll
sheets. Take one and follow the directions from Better Spell Manufacturing. First,
Origination; when facing the Spell Checker, it’s the second on the left. Then
Modification, which is second on the right. Third is Replication, located first
on the right. Next is Interpretation, third on the left. Finally Transmogrification,
first on the left. Elucidation isn’t used at all, oh well. Finally, the Spell
Checker, the machine at the far end. First use the BEBURTT spell to imbue it,
next use the OBIDIL scroll found in the ice cream bar. "Spell named OBIDIL
is soggy …" (and mispronounced, though perhaps pronounced correctly
given its effect). Use the teleporter to go back to the crossroads.

Crossroads

Go
back to the umbrella tree located by the In Case of Adventure Break Glass area
where the map, sword, and hammer were. Use BEBURTT on the tree. "Look–it’s
fall." Get the ZIMDOR scroll and head back to the Dungeon Master’s Lair.

Dungeon
Master’s Lair

Use the Prozork tablet on the snapdragon, then cut him
off using the sword. Go to the side of the house with the teleporter but face
the house and go forward. Use THROCK on the mushroom. Put the snapdragon on the
mushroom and hit it with the hammer. Take the backward half-scroll and go to the
front door of the house. Use ZEMDOR on the Mead Light either before or after pouring
it into the birdbath to the right of Harry. Put the self-lighting cigar in the
ashtray to the left of Harry. Once inside, listen to the phone messages using
the middle bulb. Back up and look to the left at the bookcase. Look to the right
side of it on the stump, and you’ll see some Flatheadia Fudge; take it. Above
the fudge there is some hungus lard and a jar of hotbugs; take them too. Turn
toward the door to leave, but go towards the red plant on the upper left side
of the door. Take the red plant cup, and leave the house to face the quelbees.
Turn around and face the house, then go toward the quelbees and their "very
delicate olfactory senses." This one takes a bit of quickness to it, but
not much. Take the hungus lard and plug up the hive. "They’re not going to
like that." Then quickly remove the lard, cut the hive open with your sword,
take the honey and go back to the house, whew! Turn to the base of the plant (the
left corner of the room if you’re facing to leave the house). "It slices,
it dices …" Take the Moss of Mareilon, Flatheadia Fudge, Hungus Lard,
Hotbugs, and quelbee honeycomb and use them all on the chia processor. Get YASTARD.

**Eat
the cup.

Look where the answering machine is and look outside through the
blinds toward the walking castle. Use OBIDIL on the castle. "This is pretty
gross." Look up at the heart and take the scroll of NARWILE. Turn around
and leave, go to the other blue room, the DM’s bedroom. Look at the window above
the side of the bed. Take the other half of the scroll sitting on the left ledge.
Look at then go through the mirror to the secret mirror room "… where
I would take lusty nymphs for trysts …" Put either half of the scroll
in your Frobozz Magic Viewer #41-22-e, then put the other half on top. Leave the
mirror room and go to the dresser in the DM’s room. Open the main doors and use
NARWILE on the time tunnel.

**Use YASTARD on the lantern of Dalboz.

Use
YASTARD on Griff’s totem.

The White House

If you don’t recognize
where you are, you shouldn’t be playing …

Go to the right side of
the house, turn to face it, and get the GLORF spell. Go back to the mailbox, open
it, and take the envelope out. Combine the envelope and GLORF spell using the
Frobozz Magic Viewer #44-22-e. Put the letter inside the mailbox, close it, and
put up the flag. Go back to the time tunnel and back to the Dungeon Master’s Lair.

Dungeon
Master’s Lair

Leave the house and teleport to the Spell Lab.

Spell
Lab

Use the spell checker on the torn spell and receive SNAVIG. Teleport
to Hades, or teleport to the Monastery, then ride to Hades.

Hades

Use
the red phone to call for Charon; you can do this one of two ways. Either figure
out how to operate the phone and answer the questions. The way to do this is by
dialing 82895. The other way to do this is use KENDALL on the * key, to change
it to "what is all this? I just want to call the damn shuttle, is that so
much to ask?" Once Charon appears, give him two Zorkmids, one at a time.
Be taken across the River Styx. Go to the gates and get your mail; open it with
the letter opener souvenir. Receive GLORF then meet up with the "Basic Two-Headed
Guardian of Hades Type Creature." Listen to its rant pointing suggestions
at other adventure games "… red pages, blue pages …"

**Cast
OBIDIL.

Go back to Charon and cast SNAVIG. Go back over to Basic Two-Headed
Guardian of Hades Type Creature, and when you punch out make sure to check out
as Charon. Once beyond the gates, turn and look for the another totem. Once you
find Brog, on your left, take note of the cave that’s a "… good place
to hide." Open the time tunnel with NARWILE and use YASTARD to send Griff
into the tunnel.

Back on Disc 1

Watchdragon

Once
on the nice little archipelago, look to the left and fly over to the other foot.
Pull the rightmost toe. Fly over to the stomach, then left to the hand and get
the air pump. Go back to the stomach and look through the rubble for the inflatable
raft and Captain, take them. Fly to the head and put the raft in one nostril and
the captain in the other. Inflate them both, then go inside the Watchdragon’s
mouth. Go to the Uvula (the hanging-down thingie in the back of the mouth) and
get the Coconut of Quendor. Yes, that guy trying to make the pina colada that
is "short on ingredients" is Sneffle. Just take the rope, and tie it
to a tooth on the right. Once he falls, take the rope and the golden tooth. Put
the Coconut of Quendor in the raft and head back outside the Watchdragon’s mouth.
Once outside, tie the raft and captain together with the rope. Head back inside
the Watchdragon.

**Click on the Captain a couple of times.

Use the
tooth to pop the Captain, and hurry out of the mouth. "Ah, that was easy …"
Turn around, go toward the raft, and pick up the Coconut. Put the Coconut of Quendor
on the red pillow closer to the right. Then leave through the time tunnel.

Back
on Disc 2

Hades

Go back over to the Basic Two-Headed Guardian
of Hades Type Creature. Cast SNAVIG on him and go over to Charon and ride back
over the River Styx. Use the teleporter and go to the Dungeon Master’s Lair

Dungeon
Master’s Lair

Go to the time tunnel, and this time send Brog to the
White House.

The White House

Turn around and pick up the Flickering
Torch (the one on the right). Go to the front door and take off the "boards
hurting house." Once inside … ooh, grues … Go down and get the grue
eggs located in the little nest. Turn right and eat some of the rocks. Go back
up the stairs. Go to the little stove on the floor next to the door. Use the flickering
torch to start a fire and boil at least one of the grue eggs, more if you make
a mistake on the next part. Aim for the closest stalactite and throw a boiled
grue egg. Jump across the canyon to the puzzle holding the Skull of Yoruk. Bash
it with the stick and take the skull. Put the skull in its "nice home"
on the left, then leave.

Meanwhile, back at the Inquisition …

Use
the teleporter to head back to the Crossroads.

Crossroads

Go
back to the beginning, all the way back to the bottom of well. Look up at the
rope used to come down in the first place. Cast GLORF on the rope, making sure
to cast the spell and not go up. Go back to the Monastery either by the Underground
Underground or through the teleporter.

Monastery

Look at the
puddle on the left, then look up. "Well, that’s just great …"
Combine your sword and the rope for the "little tougher to market" invention.
Use the new item to go up the grate. You should recognize where you are. Go to
the control on the right side and select the Hall of Inquisition. Go left then
forward at the right to the three-wheeled controls. Turn the third and first ones.
Go and pull the switch. Turn around to the bin that you just came from and take
the Lucy totem. Learn some history at the exhibits. Before viewing the "Closing
the Time Tunnels," pull the switch all the way down. Go through the door
at the other end and hit the red button to the left to open up the ZT&T communication
device. Take the middle hammer, and attach it to the robot in Closing the Time
Tunnels. Have the robot hammer away once again, opening the last time tunnel.
Cast NARWILE and send Lucy through the time tunnel.

Back on Disc 1

Port
Foozle

Go to the Gambling Hall, where it’s ladies’ night.

**Read
the minds of the bartender and Floyd.

Go toward the bartender and turn around
to play Alpine’s Quandary. Back up, go forward and turn to the right, go toward
the dartboard. While the fly is buzzing around, hit it with the 4 card. Since
it is now a 5, Alpine’s Quandary can be won putting the cards in the order of
5, 1, 2, 3 (or 3, 2). Time to play Grue, Fire, Water. Read Jack’s mind and continuously
beat him; if he thinks grue, choose fire; if he thinks fire, choose water; if
he thinks water, choose grue. Sometimes he’s not so direct in his thoughts, but
Lucy is wearing enough to lose a few times. After losing five times, he’ll give
you the Cube of Foundation. Put the cube in the last remaining place and leave.

Prison

Listen
to the music; you’re installing the game … wait … no. Bother Jack by shaking
the vent a number of times until he gives you something to "blow your nose
on." Use the letter opener on the screws of the grate to take it off, and
take the LEXDOM scroll. Turn around and take the notice of the totemization. Put
the notice under the door, cast LEXDOM on the door, push the key out using the
letter opener, and pull the notice to get the key. Use the key on the door and
leave to the left. Go to the door control with the camera views. Change 23BA to
31AB and hit the button.

Flathead Mesa

Cast the BOOZNIK spell
on the spell book. Go back inside the castle and get the three artifacts. Go to
the tent where the guards are. Cast VORZER on the tent. Go to the electricity
buzzing and cast MARGI, look to the left, and unplug the gate. Use the sword to
cut the gate and look at the "handy little nook" at the bottom of the
tower. Lift the lid and put the Skull of Yoruk in it. Go up the tower to the "big
cube-shaped hole" and put the Cube of Foundation in it. Continue up
to the top of the tower, put the Coconut of Quendor in the one cup area, and put
Dalboz in the other. Look up and cut the cable with the sword. Once Jack points
out that you’re "not the cable guy," quickly cast MAXOV.