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Topic: Layout change

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All Forums : [General] : Off Topic Forum > Layout change
16 APR 2010 at 9:32pm

AShadowWalker

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Originally Posted By Caroline (16 APR 2010 3:16am)
I don't think I'll let Shadow do my recruiting for me.

[s][size=14]Wanted[/s] Desired

Men to crew luxury ship as it sails gently around the Mediterranean Sea, stopping at all the cute and touristy islands it can find, and as many secluded beaches as they can navigate into.

Spoiler Alert[img]http://comps.fotosearch.com/bigcomps/IST/IST523/1243800.jpg [/img]

Must be willing to learn how to a) sail the boat and b) catch fish.  Pre-existing cooking skills will be an advantage.


A.  Sailing
Spoiler Alert[img]http://z.about.com/d/movies/1/0/F/b/2/piratespubk.jpg[/img]

B. Catching fish.
Spoiler Alert[img]http://www.paabo.ca/uirala/uini-seagoingskinboats_files/greenlandinuit.jpg[/img]

C. Cooking Skills
Spoiler Alert[img]http://miamidadeclaims.com/burning%20kitchen.jpg[/img]

Other duties will include
Giving massages to the female guests on request, (training will be provided if necessary); providing entertaining conversation at mealtimes; dancing if requested; driving hire cars and accompanying the female guests on various daytrips; frolicking in the water and on picnics to various beaches.


Massage
Spoiler Alert[img]http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4003/4447363705_dcd1587b64.jpg[/img]


Dining: Bring your own blood.
Spoiler Alert[img]http://www.lacarmina.com/blogpics/091102_vampirecafe4.jpg[/img]

Dancing/Driver/Female [s]Escort[/s] Chaperone
Spoiler Alert[img]http://www.hotflick.net/flicks/2005_Deuce_Bigalow__European_Gigolo/005DBE_Rob_Schneider_060.jpg[/img]

Preferred age: 35 and over.  
Spoiler Alert[img]http://www.acclaimimages.com/_gallery/_images_n300/0032-0501-3122-5258_smiling_toothless_old_man.jpg[/img]

Essential Requirements.
Must be fluent in English, able to swim and relax and to be of a playful and sunny nature.  Applicants with musical abilities will be given preferential selection as will those from physically attractive men who meet all the above criteria.

Please supply recent photo.  


Naturally, I wouldn't keep such a delightful summer to myself.  Girlfriend buddies are most welcome to join me.  Afterall, no matter how interesting the guys are, a girl needs her girlfriends.
 

Really NICE LOOKING  Caroline buddy girl!?
Spoiler Alert[img]http://i.fanpix.net/images/orig/2/d/2djnfm8zd5wfd2n5.jpg[/img]



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17 APR 2010 at 2:33am

Caroline

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DEFINITELY not letting Shadow anywhere near the applications.   What a scurvy looking bunch he picked out.  


Traveller, sorry dear.  I don't do lessons.  At my age, a woman gets impatient.  





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17 APR 2010 at 6:41am

Ivinia

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Originally Posted By Caroline (14 APR 2010 11:39am)
Do I get the whip and a ship full of hunky semi-naked galley slaves?


What are we? Chopped liver? >


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17 APR 2010 at 12:25pm

Caroline

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Ahhh..... sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander Ivinia.  


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17 APR 2010 at 6:32pm

AShadowWalker

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Originally Posted By Ivinia (17 APR 2010 6:41am)
Originally Posted By Caroline (14 APR 2010 11:39am)
Do I get the whip and a ship full of hunky semi-naked galley slaves?


What are we? Chopped liver? >


We are not all that bad Ivinia, but like the writer of the article......Caroline and Traveler and all the other impressionable junior high school ladies can keep Fnord and Taurnil Mithrandir with their flashy smiles and bare hairy naked chests.... we are a surprising delicacy that only truly civilized and refined "ladies" can rightfully appreciate!  


Spoiler Alerthttp://www.sallybernstein.com/food/single-articles/chopped_liver.htm

Spoiler Alerthttp://blog.ruhlman.com/2008/04/best-foie-gras.html

So we will have to look elsewhere to be  truly appriciated Ivinia!! 8-)

We should not settle for the [s]rabble[/s] Plebeians to come and appreciate us.  [smiley=devil_smiley_grintail.gif]

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17 APR 2010 at 7:40pm
Deleted UserHmm- thanks for reminding me that Taurnil also posted his photo a while back, and that he was pretty damn good looking too...

...so - Shadow - how can we comment on you (r relative desirability), if you never post a photo, hmmmm??   :-*

Ok, ok - I admit it.  Men's looks simply don't matter to me, honestly - I mean that-... er.. ok, wait- not to be a total humbug here: As long as he is not a total dog with only one tooth left in his mouth, and, err..- well- within certain bounds I don't care; - but when it comes to friendship, I really don't care.


*cough *cough*

/me slowly backs away.. - realizing that she might have started talking herself into a corner there..  :-[

17 APR 2010 at 8:00pm

AShadowWalker

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Originally Posted By TheTraveler (17 APR 2010 7:39pm)
err..- well- within certain bounds I don't care; - but when it comes to friendship, I really don't care.

*cough *cough*

/me slowly backs away.. - realizing that she might have started talking herself into a corner there..  :-[


Now you and I know my dear sweet, lovingly admired and respected.......Traveler! [smiley=raise_eyebrow.gif]

.................that whenever.......a lady tells you that she really likes you as a ffffrrrriiiieeeennnndddd!........that you are now going home to do your "hand" laundry by yourself!  [smiley=rolleyes.gif]

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17 APR 2010 at 8:10pm
Deleted User
Originally Posted By AShadowWalker (17 APR 2010 8:00pm)
Originally Posted By TheTraveler (17 APR 2010 7:39pm)
err..- well- within certain bounds I don't care; - but when it comes to friendship, I really don't care.

*cough *cough*

/me slowly backs away.. - realizing that she might have started talking herself into a corner there..  :-[


Now you and I know my dear sweet, lovingly admired and respected.......Traveler! [smiley=raise_eyebrow.gif]

.................that whenever.......a lady tells you that she really likes you as a ffffrrrriiiieeeennnndddd!........that you are now going home to do your "hand" laundry by yourself!  [smiley=rolleyes.gif]



:-[  ..um..

..buuuuttt...- then she still at least likes you enough to take the time of day to talk to you, eh?  It's at least a step better than having her make some excuse such as that she is emigrating to the Amazon where they have no internet or telephones....    


17 APR 2010 at 8:47pm

AShadowWalker

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Originally Posted By TheTraveler (17 APR 2010 8:10pm)

:-[  ..um..

..buuuuttt...- then she still at least likes you enough to take the time of day to talk to you, eh?  It's at least a step better than having her make some excuse such as that she is emigrating to the Amazon where they have no internet or telephones....    


"She" can always use a "carrier vulture"  [smiley=wink.gif]

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17 APR 2010 at 9:28pm
Deleted User
Originally Posted By AShadowWalker (17 APR 2010 8:46pm)
Originally Posted By TheTraveler (17 APR 2010 8:10pm)

:-[  ..um..

..buuuuttt...- then she still at least likes you enough to take the time of day to talk to you, eh?  It's at least a step better than having her make some excuse such as that she is emigrating to the Amazon where they have no internet or telephones....    


"She" can always use a "carrier vulture"  [smiley=wink.gif]



er..  ok, how about a research mission to the South Pole?  


17 APR 2010 at 9:51pm

AShadowWalker

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Originally Posted By TheTraveler (17 APR 2010 9:28pm)

er..  ok, how about a research mission to the South Pole?  


....use shortwave.....ill hear you all the time in real time!! :-*

http://www.hamuniverse.com/shortwave.html

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18 APR 2010 at 2:08am
Deleted User
Originally Posted By AShadowWalker (17 APR 2010 9:50pm)
Originally Posted By TheTraveler (17 APR 2010 9:28pm)

er..  ok, how about a research mission to the South Pole?  


....use shortwave.....ill hear you all the time in real time!! :-*

http://www.hamuniverse.com/shortwave.html



In that case, I may have to cease to be nice, and just .... well, just tell you that, ...hmmmm  :-X, -well, that I have enough friends already, and that I'd be spending my time with them in preference to you!   [smiley=laughing.gif]
Nah - girls like me tend to be cowards. If we pick the phone up and hear it is someone we don't want to talk to on the other end, we tend to just quietly put the receiver back down again.....  [smiley=boggled.gif]

18 APR 2010 at 6:19am

AShadowWalker

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Originally Posted By TheTraveler (18 APR 2010 2:07am)
Originally Posted By AShadowWalker (17 APR 2010 9:50pm)
Originally Posted By TheTraveler (17 APR 2010 9:28pm)

er..  ok, how about a research mission to the South Pole?  


....use shortwave.....ill hear you all the time in real time!! :-*

http://www.hamuniverse.com/shortwave.html



In that case, I may have to cease to be nice, and just .... well, just tell you that, ...hmmmm  :-X, -well, that I have enough friends already, and that I'd be spending my time with them in preference to you!   [smiley=laughing.gif]
Nah - girls like me tend to be cowards. If we pick the phone up and hear it is someone we don't want to talk to on the other end, we tend to just quietly put the receiver back down again.....  [smiley=boggled.gif]

[smiley=shocked.gif]

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18 APR 2010 at 8:40am
Deleted User
Originally Posted By AShadowWalker (18 APR 2010 6:19am)
Originally Posted By TheTraveler (18 APR 2010 2:07am)
Originally Posted By AShadowWalker (17 APR 2010 9:50pm)
Originally Posted By TheTraveler (17 APR 2010 9:28pm)

er..  ok, how about a research mission to the South Pole?  


....use shortwave.....ill hear you all the time in real time!! :-*

http://www.hamuniverse.com/shortwave.html



In that case, I may have to cease to be nice, and just .... well, just tell you that, ...hmmmm  :-X, -well, that I have enough friends already, and that I'd be spending my time with them in preference to you!   [smiley=laughing.gif]
Nah - girls like me tend to be cowards. If we pick the phone up and hear it is someone we don't want to talk to on the other end, we tend to just quietly put the receiver back down again.....  [smiley=boggled.gif]

[smiley=shocked.gif]


Oh, but I didn't mean you, Shadow.  I was just talking about those cases where women feel they need to run in the opposite direction when they see a particular guy.

So... to get back onto topic.  I personally feel quite sure you'd be hired on that boat for your culinary skills, as the chief chef.  From what I've heard in the past, your cooking sounds yummy!  Do you like making dishes that are are good for the figure too? You know, organic, health-conscious types of food?  

18 APR 2010 at 10:33am

Caroline

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And I'm not delegating the hiring process to you either Traveller....

I've NEVER heard Shadow boasting about his culinary skills.   :-/

Talking about getting away from men, however, I do recall when I was 17 at a disco giving out a false phone number to shake off a persistent older man.   He had the blackest front teeth of anyone I'd ever seen, before or since.   Probably a pirate.  
  I thought it was the best way to save his face in front of his companions and mine, who frankly, were terrified of him and his buddies.  I did warn him though that my mother wouldn't like me going out with strangers, yet still he persisted.    

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18 APR 2010 at 10:56am

Ivinia

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Sometimes its really scary how these threads go into different directions. Especially so when you jump in and start reading the tail end.


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18 APR 2010 at 2:19pm
Deleted User
Originally Posted By Caroline (18 APR 2010 10:33am)
And I'm not delegating the hiring process to you either Traveller....

I've NEVER heard Shadow boasting about his culinary skills.   :-/    


You must have missed all his posts giving out recipes and talking about food, and about his life's dream of becoming a world-famous chef and opening his own restaurant...



Talking about getting away from men, however, I do recall when I was 17 at a disco giving out a false phone number to shake off a persistent older man.   He had the blackest front teeth of anyone I'd ever seen, before or since.   Probably a pirate.  
  I thought it was the best way to save his face in front of his companions and mine, who frankly, were terrified of him and his buddies.  I did warn him though that my mother wouldn't like me going out with strangers, yet still he persisted.
 

Yip. That is exactly the kind of man I was talking about.  The kind you give a false name, address, phone number and country to...  


The biggest fright I ever had was when I saw a man like that had followed me all the way home.  I pretended not to live there and walked on to the corner, and then I started running...    [smiley=scared.gif]

Lucky running always used to be my favourite sport - it's saved me quite a few times already...  


18 APR 2010 at 10:30pm

Caroline

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Know the feeling well Traveller.  At age 12 an in school uniform, I was followed by an older man and I ran across traffic to put some extra distance between us and get away from him.  Finally managed to run like the wind but the B*****d chased me even though he knew I had spotted him and was running.   I doubt he'd have left me alive.   >




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19 APR 2010 at 5:48pm

Fnord

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Caroline and Traveler and all the other impressionable junior high school ladies can keep Fnord and Taurnil Mithrandir with their flashy smiles and bare hairy naked chests....

I've had enough bad experience with girls on boats to last me a lifetime, so don't try to drag me into that darn thing (and let's leave it at that), plus i'm 10 years too young.

 

Current Let's Play: Crusader: No Remorse


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19 APR 2010 at 7:17pm
Deleted User
Originally Posted By Fnord (19 APR 2010 5:48pm)
Caroline and Traveler and all the other impressionable junior high school ladies can keep Fnord and Taurnil Mithrandir with their flashy smiles and bare hairy naked chests....

I've had enough bad experience with girls on boats to last me a lifetime, so don't try to drag me into that darn thing (and let's leave it at that), plus i'm 10 years too young.



What's that supposed to mean?  That you're 10 years old?    <_<

19 APR 2010 at 8:00pm

Fnord

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The age limit was 35, and as i'm (soon) 25, i'm a bit too young

 

Current Let's Play: Crusader: No Remorse


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19 APR 2010 at 8:49pm
Deleted User
Originally Posted By Fnord (19 APR 2010 7:59pm)
The age limit was 35, and as i'm (soon) 25, i'm a bit too young


The cap'n said she preferred them 35 and older, but the rest of us rebelled...  


There's too many worthy males of about 35 and under the age of 35 around to have a silly ruling like that one...    


19 APR 2010 at 8:51pm

MystiBob

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Originally Posted By TheTraveler (19 APR 2010 8:49pm)
 
There's too many worthy males of about 35 and under the age of 35 around to have a silly ruling like that one...    



I couldn't agree with you more, Traveller!       [smiley=bowdown.gif]

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19 APR 2010 at 9:01pm

colpet

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Originally Posted By Ivinia (18 APR 2010 10:56am)
Sometimes its really scary how these threads go into different directions. Especially so when you jump in and start reading the tail end.

So I never bothered with this thread, since I'm quite happy with how the forum looks. Today I was a little bored and found out what I missed.
From now on I want a PM from somebody when a thread in Off Topic goes off topic!!

Occasionally visiting  Uru Live (KI 0063722

.&&


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19 APR 2010 at 11:22pm

Caroline

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LOL  Did you really think we were spending 4 pages discussing colour schemes and margins?  


But you're totally right Colpet - it has gone off topic and that lovely luxury yacht seems to have wandered off-course too.  [the captain reasserts her authority over the rebellious passenger - Traveller]

Traveller, dear, we obviously want different things from our cruising holiday experience.   I'm looking for conversation and companionship and for me, that involves enough age to give a man some perspective on life, not to mention decades of witty and amusing anecdotes to entertain me with.  

Let's have a boat each.  You can have Shadow in your kitchen (good luck trying to stop him from bringing foodstuffs into your bedroom) and as many hot young men as you can recruit and I'll have a crew who can remember the 70s, won't mind dancing to the music and still remember all the words.  
 

Perhaps we can meet up at a few of the more popular spots for lunch and a bit of retail therapy?  
 





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